X
Five months has given me an ample amount of time to reconsider my actions during my time on Opblocks. Since I was blacklisted, I have been spending more time with real life friends that have shown me how to be a civil and empathic person. I have decided that I do not need to rely on Minecraft as a way to filter my negative emotions, and said emotions are not to be targeted on another individual. I am aware of my past and I understand that my past doings are unforgivable but I am willing to show you that I have changed as a person and just want to spread positivity. I have been a part of the Opblocks community for a very long time and the community was always the highlight of my day. Nevertheless, getting blacklisted was a way for me to recognize that my reliance on the community boosting my ego and being there when I needed to vent was unhealthy and that not everyone was open to hearing about my range of problems. I would like to openly apologize to everyone on the staff team and the former staff that I have negatively affected. I have recently gone out of my way to apologize to certain players and staff members about my gloomy attitude and immaturity. Now, I would like to touch on different topics of what I've done in the past and what has happened.
~Punishments~
Since the moment I joined Voldex Services I had been walking a fine line between getting muted and getting away with what I said. I spent most of my time seeing how far I could push the staff until I got muted. In the spur of the moment, this seemed like a fun pastime that hurt no one, but I was not aware that it put additional stress on the staff team and was a recurring problem amongst the player base. I understand that my past actions are extremely immature and selfish but I have changed the way I look upon situations and only want the best for people. My punishments from 2017 to 2020 included five bans, 34 mutes, 17 warnings, and four kicks. I take full responsibility for all punishments and acknowledge that the useless arguments that I wove myself into about my mutes and bans were completely out of spite and anger. I knew that I deserved all of my punishments but was fueled by the animosity I felt in the given situation. My most recent bans are for excessive toxicity and then the final blacklist. I eventually accepted those in stride and have taken full responsibility for what I have said. My addiction of bending the rules and trying to find loopholes has been resolved and I no long need the attention and am satisfied with what I have as of now. I am ashamed of what I have said and I genuinely feel like those words will forever be on my conscience. The mutes that I accumulated were purely out of need for attention and then turned into problematic occurrences. Further, the toxicity I extricated was completely unnecessary and I regret all that was said and argued. All of the punishments I received were out of good intentions in keeping the community safe and maintaining a clean reputation as a server, I was just too naive to understand that my immaturity and toxic attitude was a negative attribute to the server.
~Nathan~
Genuinely, Nathan and his friends will always have a special place in my heart. They have been some of my longest remaining friends. My history with them is unmatchable and they have made me comprehend my punishments and helped me move on from the server. Luckily, I have recently reconciled with Nathan and his friend group and we are on relatively good terms. I can say that his friends Vapory, AutoClucker, SirWilly, and others all morally accept me now which is a huge milestone that I surpassed. Additionally, I have apologized to a vast majority of people that I seemed to have personal problems with. Luckily, I acknowledged that the negative disputes I was involved in were not getting me anywhere near the girl I aspire to be and that my attitude was extremely detrimental to people's overall mental health and happiness. What I was doing was exceedingly incorrect and I have come forward to take all responsibility for my actions. Furthermore, most of the Opblocks community is not educated on my past and what my previous actions are, which is a way for me to create a new reputation. With the most recent disputes, I do not see myself being as active as I have been in the past which may be a positive if I am unbanned.
I understand completely that my history is rocky and immature and I also understand if you do not want that back on your server. Take my word that I have been working on my character and I have come to the realization that my past is not something to be proud of or brag about. Toxicity is not a trait that others consider cool, and is not something that is attractive to anyone. Genuinely, I am proud of how far I have come as a person and I am turning over a new leaf
~Punishments~
Since the moment I joined Voldex Services I had been walking a fine line between getting muted and getting away with what I said. I spent most of my time seeing how far I could push the staff until I got muted. In the spur of the moment, this seemed like a fun pastime that hurt no one, but I was not aware that it put additional stress on the staff team and was a recurring problem amongst the player base. I understand that my past actions are extremely immature and selfish but I have changed the way I look upon situations and only want the best for people. My punishments from 2017 to 2020 included five bans, 34 mutes, 17 warnings, and four kicks. I take full responsibility for all punishments and acknowledge that the useless arguments that I wove myself into about my mutes and bans were completely out of spite and anger. I knew that I deserved all of my punishments but was fueled by the animosity I felt in the given situation. My most recent bans are for excessive toxicity and then the final blacklist. I eventually accepted those in stride and have taken full responsibility for what I have said. My addiction of bending the rules and trying to find loopholes has been resolved and I no long need the attention and am satisfied with what I have as of now. I am ashamed of what I have said and I genuinely feel like those words will forever be on my conscience. The mutes that I accumulated were purely out of need for attention and then turned into problematic occurrences. Further, the toxicity I extricated was completely unnecessary and I regret all that was said and argued. All of the punishments I received were out of good intentions in keeping the community safe and maintaining a clean reputation as a server, I was just too naive to understand that my immaturity and toxic attitude was a negative attribute to the server.
~Nathan~
Genuinely, Nathan and his friends will always have a special place in my heart. They have been some of my longest remaining friends. My history with them is unmatchable and they have made me comprehend my punishments and helped me move on from the server. Luckily, I have recently reconciled with Nathan and his friend group and we are on relatively good terms. I can say that his friends Vapory, AutoClucker, SirWilly, and others all morally accept me now which is a huge milestone that I surpassed. Additionally, I have apologized to a vast majority of people that I seemed to have personal problems with. Luckily, I acknowledged that the negative disputes I was involved in were not getting me anywhere near the girl I aspire to be and that my attitude was extremely detrimental to people's overall mental health and happiness. What I was doing was exceedingly incorrect and I have come forward to take all responsibility for my actions. Furthermore, most of the Opblocks community is not educated on my past and what my previous actions are, which is a way for me to create a new reputation. With the most recent disputes, I do not see myself being as active as I have been in the past which may be a positive if I am unbanned.
I understand completely that my history is rocky and immature and I also understand if you do not want that back on your server. Take my word that I have been working on my character and I have come to the realization that my past is not something to be proud of or brag about. Toxicity is not a trait that others consider cool, and is not something that is attractive to anyone. Genuinely, I am proud of how far I have come as a person and I am turning over a new leaf
